I have read suggestions in books like ADD Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life about having a clutter buddy to help de-clutter and organize. Gerard Montigny of Succeeding with ADHD also talks about ADHD Cleaning Buddies. As a an ADD Coach and a person with Adult ADD I also think having a buddy to help is a great idea.
Many people with ADD first need to get past the idea that they should be doing things all by themselves. Then after getting past that issue the next issue is being able to trust somebody enough. Sometime it can be challenging for people with ADD to admit they need help. It can also be embarrassing to let somebody else see how bad things may have become too.
The question to ask is: Does the feeling of having a clean organized environment out weigh a few moments of uneasiness or embarrassment?
If the answer is yes: Then maybe it’s time to ask a buddy for help.
Tags:adult add adult adhd
3 replies to "Buddies for Adult ADD Tasks"
Hello, I just linked over here from the ADD forum. As an undiagnosed ADDult, I know what it is feel disorganized and chaotic! http://www.flylady.net has been a huge help to me.
Bettsi, I don’t see how the flylady can help anyone with ADD. When I first ran across the site I couldn’t believe my luck and joined immediately, eager to get on with finally organizing my life. I was quickly overwhelmed with all the e-mails and reading I had to do several times a DAY. Her methods may work fabulously for non-ADD types; however, for this ADDer just getting the information required tooooo much discipline, let alone absorbing it and applying it as well.
On a brighter side, one of her rules has stayed with me and brought a lasting positive change to my life. It is “CLEAN YOUR KITCHEN SINK” Somehow I’ve managed to keep it up and my whole kitchen looks better for it. She’s right when she says that seeing a clean sink compels you to make sure the rest of the kitchen looks as good!
I love flyLady. The concepts are exactly what we need….and the techniques/strategies are perfect, because you work “15 minutes at a time”…I can flutter around the house and switch gears without the guilt about not sticking to one task till it’s done.
But as an ADD-er, I needed to make some “accomodations” so that the plethora of e-mails is not overwhelming….I have outlook, so I was able to decide what kind of e-mails I want to receive from her, what I wanted to trash, and of the ones I wanted to receive, what should be read “when i get around to it” for inspiration and/or strategies, or whatever, and if there were any I wanted to pop up right away. Bottom line? All “reminders” go in the trash. I keep “testimonials” “musings” and other various essays and motivational pieces. That’s it. And I read them when I can be doing “recreational” reading. NOting lands in my in box, but in its own folder according to the “rules” I set up in outlook.
If all you want is the strategies and ideas, you can go to her site and read…or buy the book, and skip the e-mails.
What I like the most about FlyLady is hearing that I’m not so different, and that others share my struggles. I love the encouragement and affirmation, and the constant reminder that housework (or any work) done imperfectly is a step in the right direction!
I think the reminders are most helpful to those SAHM who find they get glued to the computer (into hyperfocus) and need to be startled out of it and into doing what needs doing.
Me, I need the startle effect, but not at home…at work (witness this comment done while I’m at the office!)
So I set up “flylady-esque” reminders via my own yahoo group “flyingatwork” that force me to ‘fess up to whether I am on task or not, to set my goals for the morning, afternoon, and review my day (on task/off task/goals met or not, why, why not, what to reinforce, what to change for the next day to make things go better.
When the e-mails come,I have to answer the questions, and send it to a friend. We keep each other accountable.
Different things work for different ADD-ers.
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PING:
TITLE: Cleaning Buddies
URL: http://www.ladd.co.za/blogware/?p=49
IP: 72.29.68.220
BLOG NAME: Conversations in my Head
DATE: 01/19/2006 01:09:47 PM
The buddy system is one I employ as an ADD coach often, but I am normally part of the process and the goal is always for the buddy to only be a temporary helper.
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